fears and anxieties

fear

Feelings Evoked by an Anxiety Response.

Feelings Evolved from A Reaction. 

fear of heights, of clowns, of spiders, of the dark, of tests, of fire ... 

fear

fear is a chemical reaction, in your brain, to a stimulus, which causes the heart rate to increase and breathing to become more shallow. 

i'm afraid of bugs, and big angry dogs, and mice, and rats. 

there is a difference between fear and anxiety. i feel afraid and anxious about many things. big things, like abandonment, being alone, and getting terribly lost. i am anxious about finding a parking spot, or getting my administrative paperwork done on time. i am anxious about going somewhere new. i am anxious about meeting new people and going to parties, and being in social situations. 

fear

fear is like waking up and seeing a hungry lion on your bed about to eat you ... that would be FEAR!

my Dog is anxious around new dogs. but she also has fears. Dog is afraid of laundry being sorted into piles. it upsets her so much that she will run upstairs and hide, or hide behind the couch, or one time she jumped up on SC's lap for protection ... (she is a big dog - not a lap dog)

Dog is also afraid of snow falling off the roof. today she followed me everywhere around the house to avoid having to be alone as small drifts of snow fell from the roof past the living room window.

fear

i think that fear is there to tell us that something is wrong. i think that our bodies talk to us through our fears. fear is an evolutionary mechanism that limits our ability to do stupid things. for example, i have a legitimate fear of pain. therefore, i am afraid of fire. i am afraid to put logs on a campfire because i don't want to get burned. fear of strange men on a bus who are drunk, and loud, and harassing you ... well that makes sense. your body tells you that this situation is not okay. 

i think that our bodies, and our brains, know more about our world that we consciously do. fear is a message that something is wrong. 

i wish that i could be like my dog; be afraid of silly things like dirty clothes being put into piles, and be able to follow around my person for protection. i wish that i could be a child and climb into a parent's lap for protection. 

but since we are adults, we need to know how to help ourselves with our fears that make us anxious. because we don't need to live our lives afraid. 

from "How Things Work"

Eight Practical Tips

The Prevention magazine article "What are you afraid of?: 8 secrets that make fear disappear" offers these tips for dealing with everyday fears:

1. It doesn't matter why you're scared. Knowing why you've developed a particular fear doesn't do much to help you overcome it, and it delays your progress in areas that will actually help you become less afraid. Stop trying to figure it out.
2. Learn about the thing you fear. Uncertainty is a huge component of fear: Developing an understanding of what you're afraid of goes a long way toward erasing that fear.
3. Train. If there's something you're afraid to try because it seems scary or difficult, start small and work in steps. Slowly building familiarity with a scary subject makes it more manageable.
4. Find someone who is not afraid. If there's something you're afraid of, find someone who is not afraid of that thing and spend time with that person. Take her along when you try to conquer your fear -- it'll be much easier.
5. Talk about it. Sharing your fear out loud can make it seem much less daunting.
6. Play mind games with yourself. If you're afraid of speaking in front of groups, it's probably because you think the audience is going to judge you. Try imagining the audience members naked -- being the only clothed person in the room puts you in the position of judgment.
7. Stop looking at the grand scheme. Think only about each successive step. If you're afraid of heights, don't think about being on the fortieth floor of a building. Just think about getting your foot in the lobby.
8. Seek help. Fear is not a simple emotion. If you're having trouble overcoming your fear on your own, find a professional to help you. There are lots of treatments for fear out there, and no good reason not to try them under the guidance of someone with training and experience.

and as always ... be kind to yourself, 

xoxo

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