my brain

being inside my brain these days would be like standing in a hailstorm ... or trying to outrun a tornado. my brain is constantly going; worrying, thinking, singing songs, repeating sentences, worrying some more. 

i wanted to explain the way i think about my brain. 

i feel it in layers. 

Jung believed:

" [...]  that the mind could be divided into unconscious and conscious parts. He felt that the unconscious mind was made up of layers. The personal unconscious is the part of the unconscious mind in which is stored each person's unique personal experiences and memories that may not be consciously remembered. Jung believed that the contents of each person's personal unconscious are organized in terms of complexes - clusters of emotional unconscious thoughts. One may have a complex towards their mother or towards their partner. Jung referred to the second layer of unconsciousness as the collective unconscious. This level contains memories and behavioural predisposition's that all people have inherited from common ancestors in the distant human past, providing us with essentially shared memories and tendencies. People across space and time tend to interpret and use experience in similar ways because of "archetypes" - universal, inherited human tendencies to perceive and act in certain ways. During analytic therapy, Jung may use certain archetypes to explain a persons unconscious thoughts that in turn affect their outward behaviour." 

 http://www.psychologycampus.com/analytical-psychology.html

but that isn't what i mean. i mean that my mind is in layers of thought, thinking at the same time, making my head loud and crowded at all times. 

at the back are the worrying thoughts that are always there. in the background. the next layer takes in what i see and hear and touch and smell and taste. then there is the next layer where music lives. lyrics and melodies running in a loop in the background. then there is the layer that thinks about what i am doing as i am doing it. and then the front layer which thinks the sentences that i am going to say aloud. sometimes in a loop. like, i will think the sentence "we need milk." and i will think that sentence over and over again in a loop until i say it aloud. other times i just think the sentence once before i say it. 

all that goes on at the same time. it's crowded in my head. making my head quiet is nearly impossible. the only time my head is quiet is in the early hours of the morning when i am half asleep and half awake. it's why i like sleeping in. sleeping in gives me time for my head to be quiet. 


does anyone else think the way i do? does anyone else have a busy head? or am i totally crazy?

be kind to yourself, 

xoxo

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fears and anxieties

fear

Feelings Evoked by an Anxiety Response.

Feelings Evolved from A Reaction. 

fear of heights, of clowns, of spiders, of the dark, of tests, of fire ... 

fear

fear is a chemical reaction, in your brain, to a stimulus, which causes the heart rate to increase and breathing to become more shallow. 

i'm afraid of bugs, and big angry dogs, and mice, and rats. 

there is a difference between fear and anxiety. i feel afraid and anxious about many things. big things, like abandonment, being alone, and getting terribly lost. i am anxious about finding a parking spot, or getting my administrative paperwork done on time. i am anxious about going somewhere new. i am anxious about meeting new people and going to parties, and being in social situations. 

fear

fear is like waking up and seeing a hungry lion on your bed about to eat you ... that would be FEAR!

my Dog is anxious around new dogs. but she also has fears. Dog is afraid of laundry being sorted into piles. it upsets her so much that she will run upstairs and hide, or hide behind the couch, or one time she jumped up on SC's lap for protection ... (she is a big dog - not a lap dog)

Dog is also afraid of snow falling off the roof. today she followed me everywhere around the house to avoid having to be alone as small drifts of snow fell from the roof past the living room window.

fear

i think that fear is there to tell us that something is wrong. i think that our bodies talk to us through our fears. fear is an evolutionary mechanism that limits our ability to do stupid things. for example, i have a legitimate fear of pain. therefore, i am afraid of fire. i am afraid to put logs on a campfire because i don't want to get burned. fear of strange men on a bus who are drunk, and loud, and harassing you ... well that makes sense. your body tells you that this situation is not okay. 

i think that our bodies, and our brains, know more about our world that we consciously do. fear is a message that something is wrong. 

i wish that i could be like my dog; be afraid of silly things like dirty clothes being put into piles, and be able to follow around my person for protection. i wish that i could be a child and climb into a parent's lap for protection. 

but since we are adults, we need to know how to help ourselves with our fears that make us anxious. because we don't need to live our lives afraid. 

from "How Things Work"

Eight Practical Tips

The Prevention magazine article "What are you afraid of?: 8 secrets that make fear disappear" offers these tips for dealing with everyday fears:

1. It doesn't matter why you're scared. Knowing why you've developed a particular fear doesn't do much to help you overcome it, and it delays your progress in areas that will actually help you become less afraid. Stop trying to figure it out.
2. Learn about the thing you fear. Uncertainty is a huge component of fear: Developing an understanding of what you're afraid of goes a long way toward erasing that fear.
3. Train. If there's something you're afraid to try because it seems scary or difficult, start small and work in steps. Slowly building familiarity with a scary subject makes it more manageable.
4. Find someone who is not afraid. If there's something you're afraid of, find someone who is not afraid of that thing and spend time with that person. Take her along when you try to conquer your fear -- it'll be much easier.
5. Talk about it. Sharing your fear out loud can make it seem much less daunting.
6. Play mind games with yourself. If you're afraid of speaking in front of groups, it's probably because you think the audience is going to judge you. Try imagining the audience members naked -- being the only clothed person in the room puts you in the position of judgment.
7. Stop looking at the grand scheme. Think only about each successive step. If you're afraid of heights, don't think about being on the fortieth floor of a building. Just think about getting your foot in the lobby.
8. Seek help. Fear is not a simple emotion. If you're having trouble overcoming your fear on your own, find a professional to help you. There are lots of treatments for fear out there, and no good reason not to try them under the guidance of someone with training and experience.

and as always ... be kind to yourself, 

xoxo

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