Stress

“I was a little excited but mostly blorft. "Blorft" is an adjective I just made up that means 'Completely overwhelmed but proceeding as if everything is fine and reacting to the stress with the torpor of a possum.' I have been blorft every day for the past seven years.” 
― Tina Fey

stress. 

we all have it. and some stress can be healthy. stress can be motivating. 

but some stress can be overwhelming and crushing. 

“You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway.” 
― Steve Maraboli

often the things that stress me out are things that i have no control over - like other people's reactions to things. but then there are other things like being disorganized and not paying my bills on time. i control that aspect of my life and when it gets out of control, i need to take responsibility for it. but that doesn't make it any less stressful. 

the stress response is your body's way of protecting you - of telling you that there is something wrong. 

our responses to stress (fight, flight, or freeze) occur when we are overwhelmed. the problem is that the body doesn't distinguish between physical and psychological threats, so we react the same way. and the longer we are under the stress response the more ... well, stress it puts on our bodies. 

“In times of stress, the best thing we can do for each other is to listen with our ears and our hearts and to be assured that our questions are just as important as our answers.” 
― Fred Rogers

listening to ourselves is just as important as listening to each other. we know when we have had too much or are doing too much. but we often feel guilty pulling back on our commitments despite our stress level. asking ourselves the right questions about our ability to continue, about our health, is as important as making the decision to stop and take time for ourselves. without those questions, we can get swallowed up in our stress. 

“Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.” 
― Jane Wagner

some stress is unavoidable. it just is. life in this western society is go go go fast fast fast produce produce produce. and a person who stops to smell the roses is self-indulgent and selfish. which is totally untrue, by the way ... i know because i stepped out of my life for a few months and let myself practice self-care and the world didn't end. the world kept turning, in fact. and nothing fell apart just because i took time for myself. 

“Stress is the trash of modern life-we all generate it but if you don't dispose of it properly, it will pile up and overtake your life.” 
― Danzae Pace

so what? 

what do we do to deal with stress? well, quite frankly i am NOT an expert on dealing with stress. i'm the opposite of an expert. geez, one of my closest friends is nicknamed captain stressy pants, so between myself and my friends i know a LOT about what causes stress what affects it has on your body and on your health ... but when it comes to self-care, i am leaving it up to the Canadian Mental Health Association http://www.cmha.ca/mental_health/stress/#.U4-p0_ldUuc to give you advice:

Identify the problem. Is your job, school, a relationship with someone, or worries about money causing stress? Are unimportant, surface problems hiding deeper problems? Once you know what the real problem is, you can do something about it.

Solve problems as they come up. What can you do, and what are the possible outcomes? Would that be better or worse than doing nothing? Remember, sometimes solving a problem means doing the best you can—even if it isn’t perfect—or asking for help. Once you’ve decided on a solution, divide the steps into manageable pieces and work on one piece at a time. Improving your problem-solving skills is a long-term strategy that can help you feel like you’re in control again.

Talk about your problems. You may find it helpful to talk about your stress. Loved ones may not realize that you’re having a hard time. Once they understand, they may be able to help in two different ways. First, they can just listen—simply expressing your feelings can help a lot. Second, they may have ideas to help you solve or deal with your problems. If you need to talk with someone outside your own circle of loved ones, your family doctor may be able to refer you to a counsellor, or you may have access to one through your school, workplace, or faith community.

Simplify your life. Stress can come up when there are too many things going on. Learning to say no is a real skill that takes practice. Try to look for ways to make your to-do list more manageable.

Learn helpful thinking strategies. The way you think about situations affects the way you respond to them. Unhelpful thoughts, such as believing that everything must be perfect or expecting the worst possible outcome, can make problems seem bigger than they really are.

Learn about stress management. There are many useful books, websites, and courses to help you cope with stress. There are also counsellors who specialize in stress. There may be stress management courses and workshops available through your community centre, workplace, or school.

Start on the inside. Practices like yoga, meditation, mindfulness, prayer, or breathing exercises can help you quiet your mind and look at problems from a calmer, more balanced point of view. With time, these practices can help you manage your response to stressful situations as they come up.

Get active. Physical activity can be a great way to reduce stress and improve your mood. Activity could be anything from taking up a new sport to walking. The most important part is that it gets you moving and you enjoy it—it shouldn’t feel like a chore. If you experience barriers to physical activity, try talking to your doctor or care team for ideas.

Do something you enjoy. Making time for hobbies, sports, or activities that you find fun or make you laugh can temporarily give you a break from problems. Listen to music, read, go for a walk, see a friend, watch your favourite movie, or do whatever makes you feel good. This can give you a little mental distance from problems when you can’t deal with them right away.

so ... now i need to practice those strategies myself! i hope you can take something from this post. 

be kind to yourself, 

xoxo

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